Orgy

It was a dark room – light coming in from the street casting off the slightest of silhouettes.  As I slowly became aware of what was happening I realized that I was experiencing a full blown gastrointestinal orgy – and everyone wanted to leave NOW.  Waking up at 4:30am to a gastrointestinal emergency is a nightmare.  Throw in the fact that I was sleeping in a place having never set foot in before, lights are off, the stress of having to catch a plane, and a vague recollection of where the bathroom is supposed to be – it was quite a fright.

It started with lunch at Magnolia’s Chinese restaurant in Niagara Falls, followed by home made tuna casserole (homemade hummus was the substitute cream of mushroom soup) and salad in Toronto, a few pitchers of Amsterdam Amber beer, and to top it off the Kings Crown Nachos at Sneaky Dees in Toronto with more beer.  It was a day of catching up with friends and getting to know new ones.  It started off innocent enough – food, followed by beer followed by more food.  It took a while for the orgy to get into full swing but as I left Sneaky Dees, I knew that it was not going to be a normal night.

The worst part is the orgy is still in progress.  As I write this, 18,000 feet up in the air on my way to Chicago (flight UA 541), I’ve abused the toilet and the ear drums of fellow passengers twice.  Some of them look at me with shame, others take pity on me but all are grateful to not be in my shoes.

United Airlines – your toilet paper sucks.  Of all of the cost cutting measures, nothing engenders the scorn of your flying passengers more than knowing that you’ve cheaped out by utilizing wafer thin sand paper that tears when you grab at it and somehow manages to shred skin when using it.   Raise you prices by a few cents for each flight, we won’t mind.  Ask yourself UA, who really wants to poop in a tin can thousands of feet in the air surrounded by strangers?  I’ll tell you who, people who have no choice.

In all honesty, I ate way too much only because I was having a good time and it’s been a while since I had been out socializing and drinking.  However I blame the refried beans in the nachos for my current predicament.  Refried beans are now on my “I hate you for the rest of my life because of what you make my body do against itself” list – to be avoided at all costs.  I think I’m on my way to becoming a ‘picky’ eater like my friends who claim they can’t eat gluten or lactose.

On a side note, this is my 100th post since I left for Sendai, Japan October 15, 2010.  It’s weird to think that in three weeks it will have been a year since Japan was rocked by an earthquake, tsunami and nuclear disaster.  My heart goes out to all of those whose lives were devastated by the tragedy and to those who are helping them to rebuild.

Inspiration

Looking for inspiration – I have tons of inspiring quotes, media, books and resources on three topics – startups, marketing and business – but I’m looking for more.  Where do you look for inspiration?

On a side note, I’ve found it particularly hard over the past few days to not go back to my old ways.  I found myself staring at the screen having already written two or three pages – realizing that I cannot push that button that would send it on it’s way (instead of deleting, I did save it in case at some point in the future it would be acceptable to push that button again).  I understand the reasoning and logic behind it; I’m sad nonetheless.

The trip that I’m taking this week is a little more of a gamble then last months jaunt to the US.  I don’t know what’s waiting for me when I step off of the plane and although the meetings have been setup, it’s what’s going on when there are no meetings that matters most to me.  In any case, I have a backup plan just in case plans A, B, or C don’t materialize for whatever reason – but it pales in comparison.

My sleeping patterns have fallen back to four hours max then wide awake – I was more than a little crusty this morning.  It will only get worse over the next few days.  I’ll probably end up sleeping at the airport, on the plane, in weird places (waiting for a ride), just before a meeting, etc.  I may as well be doing the Uberman.

More later…

Retiring

Due to recent events, I’m considering retirement.  The thought of lounging around at home in a bathrobe, drinking gin and tonic, and frolicking around the seniors centre with a bunch of other geriatrics appeals to me.  Well change geriatrics to beach bunnies and I’m in.

Over the next few weeks I’m going to chronicle the process of shutting down a business, the decisions that were made and insights into the mind of one of the greatest businessmen that I know – that is if he’ll let me.  More on that in a few days.

A second blog update in a week is on the way.  Web update is done and facebook page is done as well.  I forgot how easy it can all be if I remember the process and system that I’ve put in place – before that it was a drag and a time vampire.

Another youngin’ is spreading her wings and spending 3 months helping at an orphanage for developmentally challenged girls in the Ukraine – more info here.  I wish that I could be at the fundraiser and wish her the best in her travels.  Good luck Stef!

I’ve found that doing a short workout before dinner has helped me the most over the past few weeks – not that I’ll be able to continue it, but just that it’s the only thing that I’ve been able to do more than once in the past few months and it’s kind of fun.

Ok, sleep beckons.  I know that I’m forgetting the whole reason for writing this but it’s late and tomorrow is a new day.  Remember if you’re not getting what you want, you need more hugs (either give them or ask for them).

Now…

Over the past month I had found a new outlet to write but now I find that outlet closed – hopefully temporarily, but realistically it may be for a much longer time, possibly permanently.  As of right now, it’s out of my control.

I had used this blog originally to write about my experiences while living in Japan.  Now seeing that returning to Japan to live is not as much of an option as 18 months ago, I find myself unsure of what to write about.  I had dabbled in a bit of personal anecdotes, business topics, and a few other things but it just didn’t seem right.  So for the month of March, I’m going to search for a suitable topic / theme and stick with that for the next 12 months.

How are things currently?  I find myself unable to sleep for more than four hours at a time – nothing new – but some nights it’s as little as two hours.  I’ve put on a bit of weight and I’m slowly burning it off through exercise.

I worry about people whom I know can handle themselves and about situations where I have no right to stick my nose in.  I fret about the future, keep busy with the present and from time to time forget the hard learned lessons of the past.  I’ve dived into resources, experts and books – seeking answers to questions that I put off two weeks ago – and finding myself in the process of discovering things about myself.

I’m at that place in life where I’m walking down a path and up ahead I can see the crossroads.  I was given the option to get ‘out’ of the current path but find that I’ve chosen to stay the course and make the hard decisions when I get to the crossroads.

Overall I’m apprehensive about the next few weeks.  I have so much relying on too few pieces on the board and it keeps me up at night.  So much planning comes down to a few brief moments in time that have been made even briefer still by recent events.

That’s it for now.

Too Much Drama

Over the past few weeks the drama component in my life has been increasing slightly bit by bit until today it finally came to a head.  To say the least, I was stunned for a few moments, gave my head a shake and thought “Huh?”  I realize that within any type of relationship there are times when miscommunication will happen.  I also realize that there are times when bringing up past conversations will happen as well.

Hold on, I’ll back things up a moment.  I tend to be the type of person who has a conversation with someone and if I see them next week will have no idea what I last said to them.  Hell most days I don’t remember what I had for breakfast, so I now have the same thing to keep things consistent and so I only have to remember one thing.  So when someone brings up a past conversation (could have been two days ago or two years ago) and that conversation came to a conclusion, I’ve forgotten about the details and only remember the conclusion – ‘ok got it no tickling’ or ‘ok got it interest only payments’.  The details are gone.

So when someone brings up a past conversation once I try to tell them – I have no idea what you’re talking about.  If it happens a second time, I try to sit them down and quietly explain “I have no freaking idea what your talking about.  If it’s in the past, it’s in the past.  It’s not that I don’t care, it’s not relevant to me today.”  If it happens a third time, I complain about it on my blog and send them an email.  If it happens a forth time, I try to limit the amount of time that I spend with that person as they’re just not getting it and we’re going to get into frustrating disagreements over who said what and the meaning of said discussion.  Too much drama.

I prefer to live my life this way – what has happened in the past is in the past.  I cannot change it, I try not to relive it, and if it’s really important I’ll take a picture or a video.  I live for today.  Chances are that today I’ll say something that contradicts what I said yesterday – or yesteryear – because I’m continuously growing and learning new things each day.  If it’s something that I care about and I’m putting a fair bit of time into thinking about it, I’ll probably change my mind in the future.   Concerning the future, I’ll do my best to influence it, avoid making the same mistakes as the past and try not to live in a fantasy world of make believe.

It’s not that I don’t like drama – love seeing it on tv – it’s just that I don’t have a lot of time for it right now.  Maybe people need to take a deep breath and ask themselves “would he intentionally go for the worst case scenario?” or “would he really do that – cause it really pisses me off?”  I try not to be a prick and chances are that there is something being misinterpreted and could be corrected by asking a few pointed questions.

Life is too short to be caught up in drama.  I plan on living each day like it’s my last and looking for the next big adventure.  Have fun!